Live Ever After: 2010

Vanessa Amorosi-Piece of My Heart

>> Thursday, December 30, 2010

Mary J. Blige-Piece of My Heart

Joss & Melissa-Janis Joplin Tribute

>> Tuesday, December 28, 2010

>> Friday, December 24, 2010

*by my household children's tree decorating committee.

>> Monday, December 20, 2010

When I think of celebrating my first born son's birthday, I think of what we have been through together. We both went through a "first" when he was born. Since then I am just so proud of him. Today he is one lively kid. He never ceases to amaze me. When I think of all that I want for him, on our anniversary, I think of this poem:

My Crown

A new dimension has arise
To become the apple of my eyes
The comfort of my womb
The start of a new moon
That bundle of joy, whom I love a ton
Is my adorable first born son
My hopes and dreams in him abound
My role as mother is my crown
In traits and face he looks like me
Yet true to dad his personality
His expression and gestures I try to read
And instill in him the "Moral Seed"
Difficulty knocks a few times a week
Advice of golden women I seek
Grace also comes to my door
Because of his live I desire one more
For me he holds the present and past
In him my generation torch is passed
He sings in the morning and laughs at night
To see him dance is such a site
I can only give a foundation strong
And provide his bad times with a song
Although his future unable to mold
I pray him health, wealth and joy when old.

*Art in its Written Form, Amazon.com

My Birthday

>> Thursday, December 16, 2010

My birthday will be coming and I am psyched as usual. I am not the typical woman who is concerned about getting old. I am so looking forward to being 101. (I am almost half way there). I love the idea of gray hair and beauty in age. I enjoy learning and gaining wisdom. I find it fascinating that what you once disapproved of in life, can turn to becoming more flexible on the same issue. What you are relaxed about now, can later turn into indignation.

Now that I am almost at my Silver Stage in life. I developed some ideas over the years. Call it knowledge if you like. I wrote them down in a journal book and thought this would be a great time to share them. I was being creative and wrote about 50 in a proverbs style of writing. I'll share only a few with you now.

Proverb by the Adviser (all rights are reserved and have been copyrighted)

1) No matter the capability of love nor the brilliance of intelligence, freedom of choice rules.

2) A gossip can never be befriended, neither a critique satisfied.

3) Morals are more precious than bars of gold.

4) True compliments are not from without but within.

5) The next time you make a promise, remember the universe was made with a word.

These are quotes I found that are amazing to me:

-I believe in the sun even when it is not shining. I believe in love even when I feel it not. I believe in God even when He is silent. *Written on a wall in a concentration camp.

-"When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." Paulo Coelho

-"Nothing wastes the body more than worry. And anyone who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever."Mahatma Gandhi

-The best way to find yourself is to loose yourself in the service of others. Mahatma Gandhi

Fun Games for Children

>> Thursday, December 09, 2010

Another thing I enjoy doing with my family are little projects here and there where they feel their talents have been used. They feel proud of themselves and that's the best that any mother could want for their children.

*The children love cooking dinner with me. Which takes a lot of patience on my part. For example, his job was to cut off the ends of the string beans with his fingers. I must say I looked at his pile of half string beans in the garbage and decided to show him once more, "only the ends.." He continued throwing away half a bean string and I decided to be more happy that he was proud of the job he was doing. The oldest said why am I crying as he pealed an onion for the first time. He found this amazing and asked 20 questions on onion vs. tears.

*We also like to make art work for decorating our outside door. This year we gathered some leaves for Thanksgiving on our trail walk. I just took it down yesterday to make room for Christmas. They want to buy a fern to decorate. Again patience, for all they want to put on the fern tree.

*The computer is always a nice way to educate as they have fun. These are some sites they enjoy using:

www.starfall.com (I learned from the NY Board of Education)
www.funbrain.com (One day my son was playing it because his friend told him about it)
www.clubpenguin.com (Advertised in a book my son was reading. Must sign up first to play)
www.mcworld.com (From McDonalds. Sign in also required)
www.pbskids.com (Used to play all the time)
www.thomasandfriends.com (Used to play all the time)
www.nickjr.com (Formerly known as "Noggin" )
www.nicktoons.com (A little more mature)

There is one more game that I know but it is for children and adults. You have to put in the search engine the game you want and have to keep vigilant as some games are inappropriate for children. I used to use it for racing games and sports games. I rarely use it now. If you want the site I can get it for you otherwise this is my list of online free games for children. If you have another please feel free to share.

Family Televsion Time

>> Monday, December 06, 2010

My Family and I love watching movies together. Now that I have children, I enjoy watching animated movies and television mini-series. We cannot get enough of Avatar the animated television mini-drama that comes on, on Nickelodian's, Nicktoons. (Look for your local air time and channel on Nickelodian. Sometimes you can catch the marathon in its completed episodes). It should be more popular than it is. This series really is a gem. I am a fan and have found some online fans as well. My husband just got into it and now The family frenzy for this show is complete. Sometimes I catch him watching on his own saying, "I don't know what it is about this show. I can't stop watching". Even though he has seen the all episodes like us.

For those of you who do not know about Avitar (the Last Airbender) it is not the movie Avitar which can be confusing. It is a story about a boy who is an Avatar or peacemaker who is reborn every generation to bring peace to the world. Aang, who is the Avitar for the generation in the television series must master all four elements to defeat a Firelord who with fervor is taking over the world of four nations. To stop him Aang must learn how to master water, earth and fire through bending. He is already an Airbender. His Journey begins when a brother and sister, Sokka and Katara, find him in the ice. He is the last of his kind due to the the Firelord.

The Firelord has a son and daughter. The villains of the series. They want to capture the Avitar. One the way to mastering the elements. Aang must get teachers and this is the essence of the series. The teachers enfold and you are surprised as they are excellent maters and manipulators of bending. It gets better until the finale. I love it because it is the true struggle of good and evil. You are able to relate to each character in some way. The writers really did and excellent job in engaging the audience that you find you can't wait to see how everything turns out.

For those of you who know about Avitar (the Last Airbender) next year there is a treat. The series continues with The upcoming Legend of Korra. You can read more about Korra on the Wall Street Journal Blog. Of course with all shows you should use your discretion. What may be fine for my family may not be for yours. Here's a sample of some of the episodes.(They will all start at the same time. Place curser or arrow on the video screen and the pause/play button will appear. Then you are able to play one at a time).

*Sample trailers have expired and were removed. Check your local listings or visit Nicktoons for viewing sample videos.

The Battle

>> Monday, November 29, 2010

Thanksgiving was great but it was after Thanksgiving that really threw me for a loop. My husband and I have had smooth sailing and we came to a bump in the road. Now most blogs do not bring up problems in their marriages but why not? How else can we truly learn from each other and relate as spouses.

It was not easy to hear all the things that led up to this point. He had a difficult time as well. We had silent treatments, to struggled for clarity, to time in our own thoughts, to expressed anger, to "just go I will live without you, I think, of course I will, kinda, good riddens." Then stillness. Then a sealed letter and long email simultaneously, to let's talk tonight and then the civil conversation of more reality testing and uncovered feelings, to more struggle for clarity but this time freeing. And Release. Smile, to giggle, to laughter and all is again, right in the world.

I have to tell you. I thought this was the big one. I even thought of all of you who are nice enough to join and check in with a few words here and there. Live Ever After (Happily) would have been no more or Live Ever After (with someone else). It really was difficult. I almost did not want to write about it but I knew I had to be true to myself and blog. That's a real blog in my standards. It's not just about recipes and jokes as I have learned.

I was really taken off guard as I did not expect it. We are at the point where we work things out simply and it has been a while since we argued. Maybe it was time for one. We became too comfortable with each other. There needed to be some shaking up to see what this marriage is worth. It took two days. But it had been rearing its ugly head for some time now, invisible to the both of us and then showed up and ruined the holiday weekend celebration. We just resolved everything five hours ago, but I tell you I am exhausted. It's the feeling of victory after a 10 mile run but better. Hearing him and my own voice speak about changes was the refreshing part. "You mean you don't want the D word?" Whew, What a relief. "I'm a keeper?" "Aaaah. Well I think I'll keep you around, just make sure you behave yourself".

Another married battle has been won. I am emotionally and mentally exhausted and going to bed now. Sleep is going to be soooo gooood. Goodnight. Thanks for listening.

The Egg Timer

>> Tuesday, November 23, 2010

My husband was reading online when he saw this joke and shared it with me. It was funny and kind of cute. The joke went like this:
A wife and husband was spending time together. The wife decided to make her husband's favorite, 12 minute boiled eggs for breakfast. She was looking around the kitchen when he asked "What are you looking for?" She said, "The egg timer". He started making advances towards her with that look in his eyes. He then lowered his tone and stated in code, "Let's have breakfast in bed". She stood for a second and started looking around again. Her husband looked confused and said, "What are you looking for now?" As she frantically continued looking, she said, "the egg timer".

"Mommy, you'll be dead...."

>> Tuesday, November 16, 2010

I have to admit the first time I heard it two years ago, it chilled me to the bone. The concept that I would die was truthful and logical but when it was said outside my head and out of the mouth of my then five year old son, this was horrifying. After the concept was repeated a few times over the years I am still a little queasy about it. I mean come on, when a child says confidently your going to die, you think for the most part "they do not lie about things like that" and "they are originally from God". They just left heaven to come here so they know the future somehow.

So my son says, "When I grow up I am going to da, da da and I am going to do this and that, too bad mommy you will not be alive to see". My back stood straighter, my hair stood up, my neck twist sharply towards him, my eyes lunged out of their sockets and my mouth reflexed and said "What"! Then calmly I said, "Why do you think I will not be alive to see you do all these great things?" "Mom" he gave me that sly look, "If you are already old now, by the time I am a teenager you'll probably be dead." (in a matter of fact, stating the obvious, let's be real and face it, kind of way). Then I thought, is there something you know that I do not know? But before I could ask the question I wanted to ask, my younger son said, "Yeah, you'll be dead". So I continued with "Why do you think that. Could you not see me alive when you are a teenager?" My oldest said, "No". I then felt wise and a cloud of resolution came upon me. "Well let's enjoy every minute together and pray that I am alive and that I will see you both as a teenager and when you're an adult and when you have jobs and a wife (you can hear the screams now, can't you?) And your children." That one created silence and they looked at each other.

They took me seriously and right then and there they started praying, "God please let mommy live to be really old to see us grow up" and the little one says "Yeah and please let mommy live to be a trillion, zillion years old to see my kids, in Jesus Name, Amen." Then I said "Amen". I paused and said, "But what about daddy?" Simultaneously they said, "Oh, daddy will be alive." (That's where I let the conversation lie).

Letum' Toughin' Him Up

>> Thursday, November 11, 2010

I love getting advice from mothers. It's a great network for reality testing and guilt reduction and having a feeling of comradery. I was at a function two summers ago and was able to meet a lot of people. One particular mother was dressed so sheik and had the nack for mingling with everyone. I was able to spend some time talking to her as my two sons were playing on the playground. She has a great job and was well educated. She was married with three older children, two of which are boys. I found her a bit intimidating but there was something very nice about her.

As we were talking I told her about myself and my boys which lead into this question I had about how to get them to stop fighting, arguing, and especially to get the older one to be more gentle to his younger brother. Well I got the surprise of my life when she stated, "I think you should leave them alone". I repeated her and said, "but they will kill each other". She said "No they won't". I repeated what she said again and continued, "but my oldest can be so aggressive and my youngest is so non-aggressive". That's when she said, "That's his role in life. His job is to toughi' him up." I then said, "but he tends to hit and push him." Again she stressed, "Step back and leave him."

I was then put to the test. I heard crying from the youngest as the older one pushed the younger off of the miniature marry-go-round. I had failed as I tried to implement what she just told me and I waited until I could not wait anymore. This woman on the other hand did not flinch and I stared thinking it's probably because it is not your kid. I ran over, reprimanded the oldest that what he did was not okay. (Mind you he would not hurt another child except his brother). I checked on the youngest and sent him back to play. The lady and I continued talking but I was still making sense of what she said.

Now almost two years later I understand that I shouldn't let them kill each other but understand that they both play a roll in each other's life and I don't always need to step in. My youngest is not the same sweet child I knew. He is sweet but a little "rough around the edges". He was able to get on a school bus for the first time without crying. He made friends with some older children as he is able to handle their interactions. He is not as innocent, as I see the little troublemaker my older son saw, but was unable to tell me. He doesn't wine anymore either, but he still likes to cuddle and give tons of kisses which he tries on my oldest son, to whom runs away and that makes the youngest chases more.

So that woman two summers ago was right, she discovered something and shared it with me. I'm thankful. Too bad I do not know her name. Hopefully I could be a mysterious mother with good advice that will help someone else. Turns out she toughin'ed me up as well.

The After Blog Party

>> Sunday, November 07, 2010

After the blog party I slept in which I do not usually do. The boys were at school and I had time to sleep and have pleasant undisturbed dreams of myself sleeping. On Saturday my husband and I drove into DC to a tutoring center we started volunteering with. Now it just so happen to be the same day as the rally to restore Sanity or fear, by John Steward and Stephen Colbert. If I was in NY I would have totally missed it. I had no excuse why I couldn't just pass by. At least I can say I was there. The only souvenirs I have are these pictures I took from inside the car, of the crowd that started to assemble and a picture of some signs I was able to get. (You can see them below).

My other blog had a party also as I also write about philanthropic giving. That was fun as well. I received flowers from my husband which I thought would become a historic event due to us moving a few months ago and to be honest I really wanted to feel appreciated. So I was on the computer and my face lite up when he walked through the door with the most beautiful arrangement. They were in the living room but had ended up on my side of the bed. I know the pollen is no good for when you are sleeping (so I have heard) but I am still mesmerized by their beauty and the fact that I have them.

Then I went to the parent teacher conference for my boys. I am happy to report they are both great at math. I am sad to report, they both live in their own world. The teacher for my oldest says she will have to wrestle him back to reality if she must and my youngest was always a sweetheart until his big brother got a hold of him. Now he is sweet but has a sort of edginess. That's the best way I can explain it. My mother came back from her visit overseas so it was nice taking to her and knowing she returned safely. Our relationship has grown into a true friendship and we laugh alot. I love that woman.

I just came off the veranda as it has gotten dark and I was crocheting a scarf for my other son. It's gray and black and it really looks nice on him. My other son had a request for a red, yellow and orange scarf which I finished. He says he likes it so that's good. I only started back crocheting after a a 7 year hiatus. We had fun yesterday as we went hiking with the tutoring /volunteer group to Great Falls in Maryland. That was crazy. I'll have to post the photo's at my next sitting. So that's the update. Chat later.

Happy 1st Year Anniversary Live Ever After!

>> Thursday, October 28, 2010

Happy 1st Year Anniversary Live Ever After!

We have reached the end of our Anniversary Celebration! Thank you so much for visiting. I really enjoyed hosting and creating a festive experience, I hope for everyone. I think I will have posted 17 posts in one day when this is over. Is 17 in one day a record? I don't know, but I did have fun. Thanks for all your earlier comments and for my new followers. I really appreciate your support on the launch of Live Ever After's second year of incredible posts. Thanks to my husbands secret, guest post of kind words and to my children for interruptions of paint accidentally falling on the light carpet, yells of he hit me, mommy save me, I don't want food for dinner just make me pancakes at 7 pm tonight, etc. I love them. They totally are the life source of this blog.

*Update: Melissa Rheinlander is # 27. Thanks Melissa. Don't forget to email me your address at **** (time has lapsed) for your free gift.

Good night everyone and I saved the best music video for last. It reminds me of the feelings most women have about themselves and being in love with their significant other. All the best to you, your family and your blogs. Keep bloggin'.

I leave you with Beyonce......

Give Aways. We have almost reached the end of our celebration. 4 more followers need.

Now we are back to our selection of music by Musiq, the Soulchild who sings, in my opinion, some of the most romantic songs. He can be deep so be prepared. The first two videos are disabled from viewing but the last one can be seen. It is my favorite of his songs. Enjoy.

I know. Why don't I put a picture of myself or state a blog name that would better suit my avatar. I was going to post a picture of myself at 20 years old when I was modeling in the Miss Caribbean pageant, but who am I fooling. I am still uncomfortable puting a picture of myself online. I am now 20 years older since the picture was taken, and the most I could do is show the picture below. So this is me. I was sitting in starbucks drinking passion tea (I hate coffee), thinking about the anniversary issue. I just bought these shoes and was meeting my husband later. It was nice to put them on instead of my sneakers. I should have put more lotion on now that I look closer, anyway it is what it is and I am what I am, but for now this is me.

Congratulations honey on the one year anniversary of your blog. I am proud of you. Hang in there and more people will recognize the value of what you're sharing. They will see how much you have to give and offer in terms of valuable, encouraging, and honest advice when it comes to relationships. Not just because you have degrees from college for it but also because you speak from experience and from the heart. Love ya.

Your Hubby

I have more music for you. But first do not forget there are four prizes left for following "Live Ever After". Click to follow on the lower right hand side of blog, then email me your address at ****(time has lapsed).

Here is Anthony and Sara:

You Can't Change Them...or Can You?

This is my post for today. Even if it is the anniversary issue. Changing ones spouse is one of the most popular ideas since the dawn of man. It's funny how we rarely think we should be the ones to change or even the source of the problem. It has to be the other spouse. Well I am not writing about change for ourselves because I think you have heard it all before. I want to focus on the other person for a change. Do I have your attention now? You. the other half is the secret to the change but it is not just about changing your behavior but helping your spouse to be a better them. You saw the best of them, remember? When you were dating and when you were on your honeymoon. You may be saying where has that person gone? Well, I first want to say that it was you who brought the best of them, out of them. How? You were probably much more gracious, patient, romantic, vulnerable, gentle, ambitious, kinder, etc.

They then reciprocate. Your other half is probably saying (about you), "where has that other person gone" as well. Help your other half to be better from the things you did at first. Be more supportive, less critical as you used to see no wrongs, buy or make their favorite desert and wrap it up, the way you used to. Build up their confidence if that is what they need. Study them and apply what they need. Be more consistent in kindness. In some cases do the opposite of what you have been doing. Ex. I used to talk alot around my husband. Now I say much less as I discovered he needs peace. He thrives on quietness. He gets refueled that way. Now I noticed that honestly there was a lot that I just didn't need to say. I was talking just to talk. Now I have more meaningful conversation. Make your own discoveries about your spouse by observation and stillness, then apply what you have learned. You will find that they will be a better them as they have changed, without realizing so have you.

the adviser, MHC

My favorite blogs are listed to the right labeled. "Highlighted Blogs". These are my absolute favorite blogs. I just noticed I did not include the new Lady Jennie as she has become my favorite over the last 6 months. She won a new blog design and was once called Miss Welcome.

Our Trip to Ethiopia is my other favorite blog which encourages philanthropic giving. I love any site that encourages people to help needy persons. Especially children.

My third favorite site is a blog but a photography blog. It is a collection of pictures taken in NYC. I am close friends with the photographer. We used to be neighbors and our children love each other. This is one of her photos of a dancer, taken in the streets of New York.

Lastly, this blog is useful as it is a tutorial. I learned how to make my own button for my blog. Check out Oikology 101. Go grab her button and take some tutorials. She makes it soooo simple.

Give Away Update:

Yeah. The Munoz Family has just won a free gift! Only 4 more friend/followers to go to reach our goal of 30. If you sign someone up and they are the lucky 27, 28, 29 and 30, you will win a free gift, courteous of Live Ever After's Anniversary.

Just email me at ****(time has lapsed) with your PO Box or mailing address. All information is confidential.

Thank you Munoz Family.

#25, LaDonna Rae, still awaiting your confirmation of gift. You still have time, up to 11pm tonight.

Let's continue with some more of my favorite selections: Whitney, Sugarland,
& Brandy

The Ultimate Favorite Posts for "LEA" Over The Year
Click to view

The Give Aways!

Even if you are a follower you can still participate in this event. Just get someone else to follow and that is just as good! Then email me at ****(time has lapsed) with your address or PO box.

I am now looking for friend/followers 26-30.

Also LaDonna Rae, #25 don't forget to send me your address as you started following LEA at
12:02 am today.

*All information is confidential*

Justin B, Mya, and Mariah...I'm going to get my hair done for this anniversary event. I'll be back in a few. Until then, these are my other favorites.