>> Thursday, March 25, 2010
I had a great opportunity this month to go to a three day workshop on Communication through Collaboration by Learning Tree, a company that provides training to several corporations. In the mist of training project managers, software engineers, and web developers, just to name a few, there are also courses on assisting in employee communication enhancement. I was so happy that my place of employment paid for this course as I am very interested in people to people interactions.
What I learned was so helpful that I will share my notes with you. There was so much information that I will share the most important aspect with you. I can see this being very helpful not just at work but of course with our spouse. You knew that was where I was going with this whole thing right? So there are four communication styles and if you understand each one you will be able to effectively fill the gap towards better communication.
1. Analyzer-Data and facts driven, communicates precisely, needs time to process.
2. Affiliator- Enthusiastic and motivated. Likes to pull everyone together, likes interaction, feeling focused.
3. Conceptualizer- Focuses on concepts, theories and ideas, innovative, wants to know the why's, "Ivory Tower thinking".
4. Implementer- Very direct, lets get it done, action and results oriented.
Analyzers find it hard to make decisions as they need time to process data.
Affiliators emotions can be a hindrance ex. they do not like to be left out.
Conceptualizers although involved in their work/project can miss what is happening with everyone else around them.
Implementers are so driven they can miss important details in not taking time to review.
Now how does this work in marriage? Some seem pretty obvious. But I was applying these concepts of communication styles in scenarios and this is what I came up with:
If you live with an an Analyzer, they need time to process what you're saying to them and much patience is needed. They have to be ready on their own terms which is a great sign of respect for them. Affiliators, like myself, need to feel needed and cared for. It is important to speak on a thought and especially heart felt level for them to even listen to you as they need to feel and know you hear them. Conceptualizers should be encouraged to say what they think. Allow them to be in their natural element by asking for their input. Their ideas need to be respected even if you may disagree. Follow up on how they think both of you can reach the common goal or end result together. With an Implementer they do not need or like details. They like to hear possible solutions to the problem. They get great peace from not having too much information to process. They like life to have a nice flow and are intellectually stimulated.
Now the four styles are not exact descriptions as our group was told throughout the course and my descriptions for the styles in marriage is just my take on application in marrige. If you could add more insight that would be great and you are more than welcomed. Until next time.